nana- in search... - Virgin Entry

Just like an entrance to my home,
I shall begin my Journal with Bismillah and Assalamualaikum.

I have been blogging in various sites
and this definitely is nothing new.
I would blog about feelings, art, people, disasters etc

Eversince the particular signiificant day,
when I felt God,
I decided to change my contents.

I am in the midst of leaving my past behind
I do turn back and look at it
Feeling sad and missing the moments,
i wish i could bring it along with me.
During my difficult moments now,
I wish i could just turn back and renew my history
I was happy then,
contented with what I have got.
Life was easier.
However,
i wanna lead a life as a true Muslim
And I know, i have got to leave it

I am now
In the beautiful process of cleansing my soul
Looking ahead and looking forward to what God has in store for me
Anticipating the miracles in life
Witnessing the happy moments of receiving new lives
Crying for the lost, sufferings and grievances of the innocents around the world
Embracing the fact that I am finally walking on a cleaner track.

Every prayer performed
is accompanied with a sincere doa
Oh God,
please grant the ones I love and loves me an eternal happiness, shelter and contentment.

Up till today,
I am still smiling to the reminiscence of
my wish being granted
To recall,
I think that day is my most Beautiful Day
I felt Reborn.

If only I could share this moment with everyone.
But, when I think about it...
I wouldnt want to tarnish my pure reformed.
I wouldnt want anyone to fabricate it.
They may not have evil intentions, but
I rather keep it.
That should always be a secret embedded deep within me.

Sarah is the only one I told to.
I wish I could tell another who cared to know.
But i could not bring myself to let him know
I am worried of the outcome
Thousand and one thoughts approached me
And finally,
I decided.. i will again bury it...

Life is so different now
And I am still struggling to understand it
I know this will be a journey
that is not going to be easy
I could feel it coming
But, i will brave the turbulence
with the help of the Almighty

I would document the experiences i encounter in this soft diary
An updates too maybe, should there be any art exhibitions I am coming up with

And yes,
there is an art exhibition coming up:
Asian Civilisation Museum
1st Aug - 31 Aug 2006